Wednesday, August 8, 2007

A Jar Full of Hope

Blogging from my mom's computer...

Thanks, Momma!

There's a song we sing at the recovery ministry at our church that has grown so dear to my heart. The songwriter simply states the sovereignty of God...He is God in our living, God in our breathing, God in our waking, God in our sleeping, God in our watching, God in our waiting, God in our hurting, God in our healing. He is everything. But my favorite part is the pre-chorus...

Christ in me, Christ in me, Christ in me, the hope of glory!

I was born a perfectionistic people pleaser. I wanted everyone to be happy with me. I wanted everyone to like me. I wanted everyone to think I was neat. However, I had a tough time reconciling the fact that I wasn't perfect. Not everyone was happy with me. Not everyone liked me. Not everyone thought I was neat. I was flawed. I failed others. Simply put, I was human.

I have a hard time being human. I want to be super-human. But I'm not and never will be. There's only one who is super-human. Only one who can withstand the weight of perfection. He is Christ.

As a believer, though I am an imperfect and flawed jar of clay (2 Cor. 4:7), ordinary and blemished, within me I contain Christ, the hope of glory. The hope that one day, when I see Him, I will be like Him (1 John 3:2). But not one day before that. Though He may increase and I may decrease, there will still be that old man that refuses to die. Oh to shed this skin and put on a new one for good!

"How great is the love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! And that is what we are! The reason the world does not know us is that it did not know him. Dear friends, now we are children of God, and what we will be has not yet been made known. But we know that when he appears, we shall be like him, for we shall see him as he is. Everyone who has this hope in him purifies himself, just as he is pure." (1 John 3:1 - 3)

Hope.

8 comments:

Amy said...

Thank you, thank you, thank you for posting this, for being so honest and transparent. I can sooo relate. I discovered your blog through Amanda's very recently, and this post hit too close to home not to comment, de-lurk and say 'hi.'

~Amy7634

Aina said...

I can totally relate Lauren...as someone also born a perfectionistic pleaser I have recently had the revelation that the world does not fall apart if I say "no" to someone or something or if I do something imperfectly...it is pretty freeing actually. It is so good to be reminded that it is only in Christ that we are perfection.

Give Matt & the kids our best!

Aina

thosetonnes said...

I struggle with perfectionism all too alike as you. (Did that just make sense). Counseling helped a lot, but still struggling. Thanks for sharing your heart!

Finally an Abrigg..... said...

neither will we. he'll be at the cowboy's game and me....just having some alone time. :)

Jeffie said...

great word, lauren! I needed that reminder today. thank you for sharing.

Ashie Nichole said...

I love this song that we sing as well. I haven't been there in the past two weeks, so it is just encouraging to read those words in the song!! You are such an encouragement!! Thanks for always being so honest!

Lisa Allen said...

Amen..Thank you for posting it,I think the fact that you admit you are flawed and imperfect just like everyone, makes you pretty neat to me....it was good to see you tonight, oh yeah, what was the name of that website..? very little memory these days;)

chavon said...

oh yes! yesterday that was the cry of my heart. jesus come quickly because i can't get fully untangled from myself. thanks for sharing. i'm calling you to day. sorry i couldnt make it last night. i need "the time" girls need sometimes to meltdown to God. haha. love you!